God's not fair

I imagine the title of this blog is an eye-catcher. It comes from a sermon I heard this week on God's justice. It is one of those sermons that seeps in to your heart and mind and continues to come back--like a cow chewing it's cud. For most of this week, I kept pushing it back down, but this morning, I took time to examine it and myself along side of it. It wasn't a favorable comparison.

The point of the sermon was that we humans want desperately for God to be fair and we somehow assume because the Bible says, "God is just, " we should be able to see evidence of that all over the place. In reality, we wrestle with the fact that things in the world--and in our worlds--seem terribly unfair and it appears that somehow, God isn't just.

Now we "good Christians" feel it is wrong to even think that there may be some inconsistency with what God's Word says about Him, and how we see things working out in daily life. But, the thoughts are there--haunting the back of our minds. Some take the approach that if God isn't the way He says He is, then His Word must not be true and so we doubt other attributes or promises of God. For me, it took a different course.

This morning as I turned over the concept of God's fairness vs. God's justice in my mind and heart, I saw that the pastor was right. God is just--as He says He is. But I am the one that wants Him to be fair. Fairness demands and immediate response. Fairness says, "look at this injustice happening--God, You need to do something about this--NOW!" Justice makes room for the grace and mercy of God to be recognized and embraced. As the pastor pointed out--were God fair instead of just, the apostle Paul would never have found Christ.

But within me, I still struggle. And as much as I hate to admit it--I struggle more with the perceived lack of fairness in my own life than in the greater injustices that happen in the world. The way I am treated is very important to me. When I am overlooked, hurt, inconvenienced, annoyed or put out--I feel keenly how unfairly I've been treated. Since I have an unwavering belief in God's Sovereign Control over all of life (no maverick molecules), I begin to inwardly rail against Him that He's not playing fair. After all, He could change the circumstances of my life, or make that person behave better toward me, right? Before I know it, I'm becoming more and more angry with God for not "taking care" of people and situations that have caused pain in my life.

This morning, the realization of my selfish focus hit me hard. And the truth of God's justice became crystal clear. Who am I to order God about? Who am I to expect the details of my life to be arranged to my exact liking--so I can sail through life without a care in the world? Who am I to secretly wonder if God really is just?

The proof of God's justice is in this--I am still around. In all my railing about how "unfair" things are toward me, I have generally missed seeing the amount of grace He has extended towards me. God's justice has given me time to embrace His grace and mercy in my own life. Were He fair, I wouldn't have survived the selfish actions, angry words, sinful thoughts, or disobedience for which I'm responsible.

Wow. It's a leveling moment when we come up against eternal truth like this. I asked God this morning to show me every area of my life that needs repentance. I begged His forgiveness for being so full of pride, I couldn't see the truth for what it was. I thanked Him for His justice in giving me time to come to repentance. And in it all, I praised Him that He is not fair.